‘Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the house
Every light blazed brightly
Nothing was doused.
“Bloody Hell” Said Santa
As he flew nearby
“What’s that over there, Rudolph?
It’s lighting up the sky.”
“Why it’s a house wasting energy
Their lights all ablaze
Don’t they realise
There is money they could save?”
With a quick word to Rudolph,
The sled descended to the ground.
Santa peered through the window,
And he saw Mr and Mrs Brown.
They were seated at the table
Heads in their hands
Before them was their utility bill
The highest in the land.
“Now what’s all this?” Said Santa
As he flung open the door.
“Why are you so glum?
Come tell Santa more!”
“Oh Santa, please help us.”
Cried a desperate Mrs Brown
“Our utility bill is so high
We can’t make it come down.”
“We’re out of money.
We are out of our depth.
We can’t even buy the kids presents
With what little we have left.”
“Oh help us, dear Santa,
What can we do?”
Santa just smiled.
“Come, I’ll show you.”
He took them around
The home that they loved
Showing them ways to save energy
With a flourish of his glove.
“Turn off some lights.
Empty rooms don’t need to be lit
Here are energy efficient light bulbs
Which you must go and fit.”
“Now see your thermostat?”
Santa pointed with glee.
“To save yourself money,
Turn it down a degree.”
“Manage your boiler better
Or replace it for new.
Get a Band A Condensing one
That will save a pound or two!”
“Don’t waste your energy
Don’t waste your time.
Don’t heat empty rooms
And you will do fine.”
“What about your cavity walls?
Are they insulated and filled?
They can be done through a grant
And will help cut those pesky bills.”
“What of your loft?
Is the insulation nice and deep?
If you get that done
Then your heat you will keep.”
“For TVs, chargers and gadgets
When you are done
Remember to unplug them
Don’t leave them on.”
“With a few simple changes,
You will save lots more.
Learn from these lessons,
And you will not be energy poor.”
“Oh thank you, dear Santa.”
The relieved couple did cry.
“We’ll do everything you said,
We promise we’ll try.”
“We’ll watch what we do
Our usage will fall.
We’ll even buy an energy monitor
And hang it on the wall.”
“One more question, Santa,
If you have the time?
Where can we get more advice?
Is there a resource online?”
“Try Housing Energy Advisor. Com”
Santa said with a twinkle in his eye
“They have experts for your queries
And good advice they’ll supply.”
There was much hugging
And armed with mince pies
Santa returned to his sled
To take to the skies.
“Merry Christmas one and all
Have good festive cheer,
And I wish you the all the best
For an energy efficient New Year.”
Your talents are wasted !